Monday, October 5, 2015

My Crazy Life

Apparently I haven't posted since January. Imagine that.  It's not that I haven't had anything to post, but everything going on seems to be bad. Or just not good. For the most part. I'll try to do a quick recap of the year so far.

My parents got divorced after being together for about 24 years. My mom left in February, and the divorce was finalized in June. There is still a lot of drama and emotion issues with this. The woman that was my best friend for most of my life is now a stranger to me.

I had a birthday in June. I know for a lot of people birthdays are no big deal, but to me they kinda are. I used to work in a place where for some people, there would be a big celebration for birthdays, but for others there was nothing. I was one of the ones that got nothing. I guess no one realized how that might hurt some people's feelings. Mine were very hurt. My husband has always tried to make it a big deal because of this. This year I didn't get anything for my birthday. It made me really sad and still kinda hurts.

Two days before my birthday we hit a feral hog and wrecked my car. It was the scariest moment of my life. We hit the hog, then hit the guardrail. My car was only 2 years old, and I loved it. Luckily we were ok and were able to walk away with very minor injuries. My husbands arms were burned by the airbag, and I had bruises from the seat belt and that was the extent of it.

The same day of the accident we had a stray dog walk up in our yard. She was so cute, I finally convinced G to keep her. That was one good thing that happened. Ever since my little dog passed away last May, I've been wanting a new one. G and I could never agree on this so I was so happy when I got to keep Sadie. We just had her fixed, and they told us she is a german shepherd mix. Mixed with what, we don't know, but my dad keeps saying coyote. I really don't know if that's possible, but when you google german shepherd coyote mix, the pictures look just like her.

And, since the old car was wrecked I had to buy a new car. We stayed with Hyundai because we were impressed with how it handled in the accident, but I wanted the same car I wrecked. They don't make the Elantra in the same color I had anymore, and we didn't like any other colors, so G talked me into upgrading to the Sonata. And we really upgraded. My car has every feature available in it. And the payments reflect that. I have been struggling with these payments, but I'm hoping we can refinance soon.

Then in July I had to go to the ER because I was having a lot of pain in my sternum. The ER Dr tried telling me it was my esophagus and acid reflux, but since we had been in the accident a few weeks before, she went ahead and had my abdomen checked out. Turns out I had gallstones and my gall bladder was infected. Surgery it was. I had a bad reaction to the anesthesia and threw up every 15 minutes for several hours. G let both of my parents know I was having surgery, and my dad got there right after I was brought to my room. He stayed with me for a few hours so G could drive home and get some things for me. I asked my dad to call my mom and see if she was coming, but I guess she decided it wasn't important enough. I know this wasn't major or life threatening, but what girl doesn't want her mother when she's not feeling well. I was really hurt that she didn't come to see me or even call to find out how I was doing over the next several days.

I have also become the Brownie leader for our girl scout troop. This isn't a bad thing, just something that is a lot more time consuming and stressful than I thought it would be. I have 6 girls that are all in 3rd grade. When they get together it's really hard for me to keep them under control. The parents usually leave so I don't have their support, either. I've got a few things in mind I'm going to try, but if they don't work, I may have to have the parents step in.

G has had to have 2 epidural steroid injections in his back for a pinched nerve that started bothering him in February. Hopefully the second one worked since the only other option the Dr is offering is surgery, which G is refusing.

We also had a family member diagnosed with Stage 4 Hodgkins Lymphoma. At the last update he was 67% of the way through chemo treatments, and at his last scan they couldn't find any trace of the cancer. Thank God for miracles. Now they will just have  to wait for treatment to be over to see if his fertility has been affected since they are trying to start a family. They tried freezing some samples, but none of them were viable. Because of the cancer he had no good sperm at the time the samples were taken.

As far as our family goes, I told G that next year I'm getting a load and we are 100% trying IVF. I'm 35 and G is 55 so we really, really can't wait any longer. I've often wondered if I could be happy with a life with no kids, but then I start to think about the age difference between me and G, and I know I don't want to be alone when he's gone.

Those are the main things that have happened this year. I'm sure there are more, but those are the ones that stick out. I hope the rest of the year is a little more calm, but I doubt it.


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